He said, I love you, baby. Begging me to repeat after him. But I wanted him to love me without words but truth. He acted like it was a game to him?
Playing with my emotions all the time, and still begging for a simple word?
He said, I love you: but realistically I'm nothing when he loves someone else.
I remember the day he fell in love with me. he asked if I'd take his last name and pass it on to our children, Lola and Aiden. So, the day he started talking about her was the day I realized he was in love with someone else.
I could tell when he was falling in love again because we went through the same thing. You spoke about her like you used to speak about me.
Now don't pretend you didn't feel like this when we first got together, everything you say to her was said to me first, like a Chinese whisper. Why is love a game to you? You feel the same about her as you used to feel about me. She is me, the only thing that holds me and her apart is a singular name. But what's wrong with me? Why did you wake up one day and decide she's better?
You once said I looked like your favorite piece of art, but art wasn't meant to look nice. Art is meant to make you feel something, fulfill you with a roller coaster of emotions, and suddenly let go and be left in extreme pain because you miss the feeling but know you can't have it. You didn't compliment me for weeks after that, but I wished on every shooting star that you would. I asked you now and then if you thought I looked pretty and of course, you said yes because you felt like you were forced to. I wanted him to think I looked pretty, not put words in his mouth just so I felt good about myself. I ask myself every day, was the pain, effort, and suffering worth it just to be in love with a man who loved someone else? Of course, it was.