Leaving eighteen
What is wrong with me?
Every single night before I close my eyes
This question plays in my head on repeat
I know I'll never be able to answer
This question
Because I don't know what is wrong with me...
I don't think there is anything wrong with me

I'm just drowning in a pool of self hate
I've been blinded, so blinded that
I can't see any good in me

What is wrong with me?
Nothing is wrong with me
I'll keep saying this until I believe it
Even if it will take me a whole decade
I will force it down my gut

Why should I surrender to the
Demons that live within me
Since when did I become so weak?
I will not surrender, I won't give up and I will not
Give in

I have been down for too long
I want to get up, being
On the ground sucks
Why did I choose to be there for so long?
What is wrong with me?
How could I have been so naive
so weak, so miserable
How pathetic can I possibly be
What is wrong with me?
All this time I have done nothing
But mistreat myself
Shame on me, real shame on me

Zainab stop messing around
Wake up crazy girl, this is
Not a dream, this is reality
I wish someone told me this sooner
No! I wish I told myself this much sooner
Maybe then I would have been
Saved from so much distress
I would have been happier

But now I know all that I
Should have known why then
Am I drowning myself in self regret

I shouldn't be angry at myself
I should be happy I woke up
I should be happy I'm finally up
I haven't made it but I will
I will be happy and free from
All that haunts me
I will be free and happy