In life's canvas, where strokes are free,
Imperfections paint our destiny.
The dance of flaws, a rhythmic beat,
Makes our journey truly complete.
A masterpiece, with lines askew,
A symphony of errors, true.
In every flaw, a beauty gleams,
A treasure hidden in life's dreams.
A dancer's stumble, a graceful fall,
Imperfections make us stand so tall.
......
At the pit of her core
despair and darkness.
Turned from the world
in loathing revulsion.
Black as coal.
The ugliness of truth,
a withered world of weight
stares back.
......
Worth it I mean.
The Breath and Withhold you lose trying to convey your Feelings to the World next to xou.
The Stamina you need to develop, to last beneath those crushing Waves of self doubt, self pity and self loathing.
To surrender the Ability to recognize your Reflection after having forgotten which dream to follow.
Endless Moments wasted for a shred of foreign, mindless acceptance.
How come you are ready to lose so much of yourself when you don´t even know what you´re so desperately in Need of.
Ready to thrash between wanting to go unseen and hide your Mistakes or stick out to feel an ounce of Uniqueness.
Because this is not going to end.
It is not going to end with you losing a Battle against yourself in order to blend into the Mass to the Point where you´ve forgotten your favourite colour.
Within your Lifetime the only Thing you´re going to realize is that what you´ve been looking for is right there.
......
i forgive my body
for all that she’s done
i free him from his sins
and nestle in her safety
i thank my body for protecting me
......
I have to ask myself this question. Why did I ever stop writing? Why have I never shared my writing to the world. Maybe it has to do with my inability to love anything I do. I guess when I thought when I was writing this, my perspective would be a romanticized mumbo jumbo about the girl if been obsessing over since the day I met her. But I think I need to write something about someone else. How can I love a girl so unconditionally and yet fail to give any love to myself?
I think its safe to say I’ve got things I need to work on. But I can’t seem to shake this feeling of love that she makes me feel. Everything just comes easy with her. I don’t hide who I am and I just want to hold her in my arms and never let go. This may sound dumb but I can already see me getting married to her. The fact that I can love this girl so much and yet, fail to be kind to myself makes me realize that there is more to love then just family, friends and relationships.
Self love is a concept that many of us struggle to let into our lives. The entire population of young adults know how important this form of love is to one another. Yet so many of us struggle daily to say one nice thing about ourselves. I guess my incapability to love myself drives from a deep dark pit inside my heart. I’ve always described my heart as an empty cauldron with a leak at the bottom. Can always be refilled, but will eventually empty. Left with nothing but a numbness, empty and depressive feeling.
But it doesn’t have to end in darkness. Many amazing events drive from love. It is not only the act of marriage that defines what love is. Love comes in all shapes and sizes, just like the human body. And the human body, that’s where love was born. Our heart can only define what we see love is. My heart see’s love in hopefulness. One day I will feel that ultimate love. But that’s just my perspective.
At the pit of her core
despair and darkness.
Turned from the world
in loathing revulsion.
Black as coal.
The ugliness of truth,
a withered world of weight
stares back.
......
In life's canvas, where strokes are free,
Imperfections paint our destiny.
The dance of flaws, a rhythmic beat,
Makes our journey truly complete.
A masterpiece, with lines askew,
A symphony of errors, true.
In every flaw, a beauty gleams,
A treasure hidden in life's dreams.
A dancer's stumble, a graceful fall,
Imperfections make us stand so tall.
......
A maiden gazed upon the glass,
A vision of herself, alas.
Her eyes, like diamonds, sparkled bright,
Reflecting back a wondrous sight.
Her tears, like pearls, began to fall,
A precious sight, both grand and small.
Her beauty shone, a moon above,
A pearl of night, a symbol of love.
Why, maiden, art thou so unkind,
To judge thyself, so harsh of mind?
......
A thousand whispers
Echo in my mind
The what ifs and the maybes
That have kept me here, confined.
An inner universe forgotten.
An undiscovered life
To find the courage of acceptance
To heal the child inside
Leaving eighteen
What is wrong with me?
Every single night before I close my eyes
This question plays in my head on repeat
I know I'll never be able to answer
This question
Because I don't know what is wrong with me...
I don't think there is anything wrong with me
I'm just drowning in a pool of self hate
......