Mishka M

Mar 5
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hurt hurts more when you don't know it's coming

i love them more than words can say,
but every day is filled with gray.
one moment laughter fills the air,
the next, i wonder if they care.
their moods, like storms, change in an instant,
a sudden silence, cold and distant.

i never know what's wrong or right,
which words will start another fight.
i walk on eggshells, all day long,
afraid i’ll say the thing that's wrong.
their smiles are bright, their love so pure,
but when they’re mad, it’s hard to endure.

they say things that tear me apart,
words like daggers, straight to the heart.
"you're too much," or "you're not enough,"
and suddenly, i’m feeling rough.
they don’t see how deep it cuts,
the things they say that make me shut
my mouth and hide the tears inside,
hoping this storm will soon subside.

they’re everything to me, my world,
but sometimes their love feels like it's swirled
with anger, fear, and endless pain,
and i don’t know how to break the chain.
their love is like a fragile thread,
one word wrong, and it’s left for dead.

i’ve tried so hard to make them smile,
but i can’t do it, not for a while.
i can’t control the tides that shift,
the way their hearts will break or lift.
one minute, warmth, the next, cold eyes,
it leaves me lost, no clear skies.

they say the things that haunt my dreams,
words like thunder, louder than screams.
and though i beg them not to shout,
the hurt keeps coming, without doubt.
i am their child, their love, their care,
but sometimes it feels like i’m not there,
like i’m just something to be blamed,
for every anger, every name.

i watch their faces twist in rage,
and feel the sorrow, feel the cage
that traps my heart within its walls,
as i try not to make them fall.
i love them more than i can say,
but what if love can’t ease the pain?

i hold them close, but feel the gap,
the space between, a silent trap.
and when they speak those cruelest words,
it’s like a song no one has heard.
i want to fix it, make it right,
but i’m too small, too filled with fright.

their moods, they shift like night and day,
i never know which way they’ll sway.
i love them so, yet i feel lost,
wondering if it’s worth the cost.

for every smile, there’s a tear,
for every hug, there’s a fear
that one wrong move, one careless line,
could turn their love from sweet to mine.

they are the best, the world i crave,
but their moods leave me feeling brave
and weak, and torn, and far away,
always afraid i’ll push them astray.

i don’t know how to make them see,
how hard it is to just be me.
their love, so deep, but cut with scars,
i wonder if i’ll ever reach the stars.

i wish i knew how to fix the pain,
how to make the love stay plain.
but when they shout, when they don’t care,
it feels like i’m invisible, in air.

i love them more than words can say,
but the things they say just pull away
the pieces of me that i still hold,
and leave me feeling far too cold.

how do i love them through the storm?
when i can’t even feel the warm
of their embrace without the fear
that something might not reappear?

i love them more than words can say,
but sometimes i wish the pain would stay
a little softer, a little kind,
so i don’t lose my peace of mind
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