what i tell people about my sister and i:

since we were babies
my sister and i never fought
we are each others
allies
confidantes
and
family
all rolled into one

what i don’t tell people about my sister and i:

my sister makes me feel the most free
and the most trapped
at the same time.
i feel pressured to speak up
even when i’d rather be silent.

we don’t mesh,
my sister and i

she is loud when it matters
i am quiet no matter what

i am happy to sit with
my music
my books
my thoughts
and let other people's words speak for me

i used to let my sister tell strangers my name
instead of sounding my way through three simple syllables

now i let my friends speak for me
tell me
what i think
why i think it

am i any better at writing than speaking?
i write things i’ll never say out loud.

even though my sister is more rebellious
i can help in silent ways
i’ll stand over the bathtub and help her dye her hair red
and hold her hand while she gets a tattoo

i’ll always be on her side
i'll always be on her side