“UNMASKED”
POEM 1 – EDEN IS HIS NAME
POEM 2 – HIM I COULD SEE
POEM 3 – NARCISSISM – THE MAN BEHIND THE MASK
POEM 4 – PARALLEL WAYS



THIS COLABORATION OF POEMS DELVES INTO UNDERSTANDING NARCISSISM, DRUG DEPENDENCY, AND A WORD FROM THE LIFE OF A DRUG ADDICT, FRIENDS AND DRUGS, THE REMIFICATIONS OF TAKING ILLEGAL SUBSTANCES, LOVE, FRIENDSHIP, AND LOVE ON HOLD, LOVE ADDICTION AND A SMALL VIEW POINT OF A MENTAL HEALTH PATIENT, LIVING WITH BIPOLAR EVERYDAY.









ANGELA CINI 19 LINES
5/290 BORONIA ROAD
BORONIA, VIC, 3155
0474361761
angelacini80@gmail.com

EDEN IS HIS NAME
Eden calls in dark of night
For numbers of the game
To spell a different tune
For wave of life is same
With tables of the road
A journey that begins and ends
As world of jesters ode -
Begins in ending of a dream
Where roads could sure digress
To danger traps and unknown scenes
Can lead one to distress
But simple shed and simple means
Will bring the monkeys smile
To one whose run the gauntlet?
To live a life of style
Not in the money eye
Our under cameras star
But out under the stars that shine
In Eden's always are.


ANGELA CINI 20 LINES
5/290 BORONIA ROAD
BORONIA, VIC, 3155
angelacini80@gmail.com

HIM I COULD SEE

I MET A MAN WHO I COULD SEE
HIMSELF. HE WAS SURE UNABLE TO BE
HIS MIND OVERRIDDEN WITH DEEP, FADED DREAMS AND LOST MEMORIES
HIM. I COULD SEE
BOTH LOST. WITH NOT ONE HELPING HAND, ONLY MEETING THOSE IN NEED
TRAPPED IN A WORLD OF SELFISHNESS AND GREED
EVERYONE IS OUT FOR THEMSELVES, GETTTING WHAT THEY NEED TO SURVIVE,
ANYTHING BUT TO FACE THE EMOTIONAL PAIN AND THE LONLINESS AND SOLITUDE OF YOUR OWN MIND

HIM. I COULD SEE
HE WAS WARM. CLEVER. THE ONE AND ONLY JESTER
HAPPY. I WANTED HIM TO BE
I MUST GO AND ALONE HE WILL BE
AS I HAVE A DREAM
THANKS TO THE MAN I COULD SEE
HE WAS FOREVER CHASING ME
BEHIND ME. WHERE I COULD NOT SEE
HE KEPT ME SAFE AND PAVED A PATH FOR ME
WITH THE ANSWER TO EVERY PROBLEM SOLVED
WITH SUTLE CARE AND UNDERSTANDING
DID HE SEE ME?

ANGELA CINI
UNMASKED, PAGE 4

22 LINES

NARCISSISM – THE MAN BEHIND THE MASK

Who is this man I have fallen in love with, in and out of love, he has become like a drug,
He is a master manipulator, he treats me like a used up dirty old tissue, not special,
It is the greatest love I have ever felt, he has stopped making love to me, and fulfills his needs with others,
I used to feel free when he was inside me, how many other loves does he have? why doesn’t he want me anymore?
He is the greatest tease, the biggest helper, he knows what to do, how to and when to,
He is the rudest person I have ever met in my life, arrogant, and very offensive,
Doesn’t care for my feelings, just uses them how he wants, he is possessive,
He is the problem solver, the charmer and the pleaser.
He is the cheater, the mind playing riddler, he is my security, and he adores me and hands out the flattery,
Who is he? I am overcome with fear, I don’t want to lose him, and I can’t make it on my own.
He has become like a drug, a strong nice drug, like cocaine, I need him to survive,
His love, his love, his love, I’m addicted to his love.
The euphoria I feel when he is there for me, when he places me under his wing,
I become filled with feelings of happiness, knowing without fail, he has got me.
Do I let go. Will he let me go? Am I just another piece of furniture to him?
How do I get this man out of my life? Underneath the mask, he is not a nice, friendly person.
I must get away from this man and shut the door behind him. I don’t need him, I want to feel like a princess.
I deserve to be treated with respect, enjoy making love, share laughter and not live in solace.
Without a shadow of a doubt, I will hold him close, as I know he will hold me closer.


ANGELA CINI
5/290 BORONIA ROAD,
BORONIA, VIC, 3155
0474361761
angelacini80@gmail.com

PARALLEL WAYS
MY LOVE, MY FRIEND, HE IS LOST, AS AM I,
MY HEART ACHES FOR HIM, HE IS WITH ME, I AM NOT ALONE,
IT FEELS SO NICE, I WANT TO SATISFY HIM, I WANT TO HELP HIM.
I WANT TO BE THE ONLY ONE HE HAS HIS SIGHTS ON, I KNOW THIS WILL NEVER BE.
WE WALK BESIDE EACH OTHER, PARALLEL, WANTING TO TOUCH, TO HAVE, TO HOLD, TO CHERISH,
IT WILL NEVER BE, THAT WE MEET, WE ARE CONSUMED WITH DRUG, SEX AND GAMBLING ADDICTIONS.
HE KEEPS A BRAVE FACE AND HE WILL NEVER BE STRONG ENOUGH TO FACE LIFE WITHOUT A PIPE, WITHOUT HAVING MEANINGLESS SEX WITH STRANGERS, HE FILLS HIS VOID, TO SURVIVE
FACING LIFE AFTER TWENTY YEARS OF DRUG ADDICTION, TO FEEL THE PAIN, THE LOSS, THE EMOTIONS DRUGS HAVE LEFT IN RUINS. THE HOURS SPENT WASTING TIME, THE MAN HE IS SUPPOSED TO BE, WITHOUT THE DRUGS, THE SEX, THE NARCISSISTIC BEHAVIOUR, I WANT TO SEE WHO HE IS MEANT TO BE, NOT WHAT SUBSTANCE ABUSE AND CHILD ABUSE HAS MADE HIM, I WANT THE MAN WHO IS IN THERE TO BE, AS I WANT TO BE.
FEELINGS OF SHAME, FEELING PATHETIC, EMBARRASSED, POOR, STRUGGLING, I DON’T WANT TO BE SEEN LIKE THIS, IT IS WEAK. I DON’T WANT TO SEE HIM LIKE THAT, I FEEL ALONE WHEN HE IS THERE,
WE SHOULD BE IN CONTROL OF OUR MONEY, HAVE HEALTY RELATIONSHIPS WE TREASURE WITH FAMILY AND FRIENDS, BE WORKING, SAVING FOR A HOLIDAY, I SHOULD BE MAKING HIM BREAKFAST BEFORE HE GOES TO WORK, THAT’S WHO WE SHOULD BE, THAT’S WHERE I WANT TO BE, THAT’S WHO I WANT TO LAY BESIDE ME.
I WANT TO SURPRISE HIM WITH PRESENTS, TO SHOW MY LOVE,
I KNOW I LOVE HIM, HE RESENTS ME, I FEEL LIKE HE RESENTS ME, IS IT BECAUSE I ENCOURAGE HIM TO TAKE DRUGS, WHEN HE HAS CLEARLY HAD ENOUGH.
DOES HE HATE ME FOR HE IS NOT TO BE, WE HAVE LEARNED TO LIVE EITH THE PAIN, THE LONLINESS, THE REACH, THE REACH FOR SOMETHING TO NUMB THE PAIN, THE MEMORIES, THE LOST TIMES
I AM LEFT HATING MYSELF FOR LOVING SOMEONE WHO DOES NOT HAVE THE ABILITY TO LOVE,
I FEEL STUPID, TRAPPED, I KNOW IF LEFT ALONE, I WILL BE FREE, I WILL BREAK FREE,
HE DOEST LOVE ME LIKE I LOVE HIM, I JUST WANT HIM TO ACKNOWLEDGE MY LOVE, MY CARE, MY FEELINGS, NOT HURT ME, TAUNT ME, CONTROLLING ME, PARALLEL WAYS.
WILL HE EVER BE PROUD OF ME? WILL HE EVER LOVE ME? WHO IS HE MEANT TO BE?
I WANT HIM TO DO WELL, NOT WORRY OR STRESS AND TO BE HAPPY, HE DOESN’T SHARE MY SENSE OF HUMOUR, SOMETIMES I DOUBT IF HE HAS ONE AT ALL.
HE NEVER GIVES UP ON SOMETHING HE WANTS, HE IS ALWAYS SOLDIERING ON, I WANT TO BE,
I WANT TO BE TOGETHER, BOTH WHO WE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE, SIDE BY SIDE.
I CAN SEE WHEN HE IS FRIGHTENED, I CAN SEE HIS TEARS,