I am a carnivore, but a plant.
I am God and man in one.
I'm a chrysalis. Mankind grows out of me.
My brain is liquefied like
a flower, so I can love better. Sometimes I dip
my fingers in it and it's warm. Nasty people
say others have drowned
in it. Not true. I am a belly
I put up travelers in it.
I have a wife who loves me.
Sometimes I'm afraid she loves me
more than I love her and I get sad and
depressed. My wife breathes like a small
bird. Her body soothes me.
My wife is afraid of other guests.
I say to her, now, now, don't be afraid.
All our guests are a single being, for both of us.
A white match with a blue head has fallen into my
typewriter. My nails are all dirty.
I'm thinking hard now what to write.
One of my neighbors has terribly noisy
children. I am God, I calm them down.
At one I'm going to the dentist, Dr. Mena,
Calle Reloj. I'll ring the bell and ask him
to pull my tooth, because it hurts too much.
I'm happiest in my sleep and when I write.
The masters pass me along from hand to hand.
That's essential. It's just as essential as
growing is for trees. A tree needs earth.
I need earth so I won't go mad.
I'll live four hundred and fifty years.
Tarzs Rebazar has been alive six hundred.
I don't know if that was him in the white coat,
I still can't make them out. When I write I have
a different bed. Sometimes I start pouring out more like
water, because water is most loving of all.
Fear injures people. A flower is softest
if you close your hand around it. Flowers like
hands. I like everything. Last night I
dreamed my father leaned across toward
Harriet. Other women frighten me, and
so I don't sleep with them. But the distance between
God and young people is slight.
There's always just a single woman in God, and that's
my wife. I'm not afraid of my guests tearing
me apart. I can give them anything, it will just grow back.
The more I give, the more it grows back. Then it launches off
as a source of help for other creatures. On some planet
there's a central storehouse for my flesh. I don't know
which one it's on. Whoever drinks it will
be happy. I'm a water hose. I'm God, because
I love. Everything dark in here, inside, nothing
outside. I can X-ray any creature.
I'm rumbling. When I hear the juices in my
body, I know I'm in a state of grace. I would have to
consume money day and night if I wanted to
build a life, and still it wouldn't help. I was made to
shine. Money is death. I'll go out on the terrace.
From there I can see the whole countryside as far as Dolores
Hidalgo. It's warm and soft as Tuscany,
though it's not Tuscany. Metka and I sit there,
watching. Her hands are like Shakti's. My
mouth is like some Egyptian beast's. Love is
all. Moses's wicker basket never
struck the rocks. Miniature horses come
trotting out of the level countryside. A wind blows
from the Sierras. I slide headfirst into people's
mouths and kill and give birth,
kill and give birth, because I write.

Translated by Michael Biggins