I start to lose the meaning of words
And I start to forget what's real
I will be on the verge of a breakdown
And no one will have an idea

My hands remain unsteady
My heart is a waking drum
My limbs begin to shake
And I don't have control of the outcome

My throat starts to close
My legs feel all weak
Even though I can barely stand
I fight the urge to run

I scream as the world begins to spin
And then the world turns black
I stare off into space
And transport myself to another place

When I wake I am no longer on earth
Some sort of fantasy land
A place where everyone is nice
And all is well and fine

Here is the only place I feel safe
And I know it's not real
It's like a child's playground
But if it's okay I'd rather stay here

It is here where anything is possible
The sky is the limit with tons of friends
They all support me and love me for who I am
Most importantly I have a life that’s worth living

Nobody here stares at my scars
No one yells at me
I am not hated by the world
People may actually care

This is a place that has hope
And maybe one day earth will be like here
Cuz the worlds messed up
And I only see gray when I'm there

I love my time spent here
Why would I ever want to leave
Cuz where I live on earth
Is the closest place to living hell

Then without warning
I plummet back down to earth
When I wake I don't know where I am
And I don't remember what I've done

To wake up and not know where I am
It is scary and terrifying
How many days have past
How long have I been out

You didn't notice and that is fine
But please fill me in
I don't know what I've done
The last five days have been a haze

Sometimes when I wake I forget my name
Or I can't place a name to a face
But slowly I put the piece back together
I fill in the gaps and I make up the rest

I will try and live this life on earth
Even if it's only a little while
Cuz before I now it I'll meet a trigger
Then I’ll leave to my fantasies