"They spoke in signs - they may also nonetheless have been words: of
discomfort, of relative comfort - an animal language"
R. Musil, Three Women. Grigia, 1924
Hey, not her, only the lung-breather
I said, and see to it that
bear backs away from the railing

But make it snappy! And the unicorn stays here
now don't look so - oh no, fabulous beast, not
on my boat! Do you need it in writing?

Good God. Not even an ape can be that stupid, can it?
Get lost! Geez, can someone please get rid
of the camel shit? Where's my list? Uh oh,

There goes the goat, then the anchor: it's a hara-kiri skewer
Great, tonight there'll be bock beer and goat steaks
When the Flood comes we might as well do it right

Oh yes, you look up for that! I believe there's a hitch
So we cast off at four, or, to clarify, get a
move on! And you can Steno your

First Lady too, with that get-up, she stays
below deck, where do you think we are? This isn't some
no-tell motel with theme rooms for breeding animals

Understood! And what's with the junk box?
Give it here! Artists' supplies? You can't be
serious? Plein-air? And even a beret, how sweet!

Aquarelle paper, water colours, and ink
I really don't believe it, somebody's thinking!
How do you plan to preserve that, pray tell?

In a pig's belly? Plasticized? Our floating gallery
Ham, the regatta reporter, shows you how it
really was! True to life and in colour

Now and again the spouse naked among the
animals, on a sheepskin, or in a sweat
making mince, appetisingly draped in flesh

Look, priceless, but if you want it, framed,
to go, it can be yours. Just between us
our customers can't complain

He paints according to your needs, no desire
unfulfilled, say, pssst, do you know the Origin of the World
Exactly, the one for the Turkish diplomat, you can credit him

With that, it's no exaggeration you can only
do something like it once, if you get
my drift, wink wink. He's our prize pony, ahem,

An odd bird, cheep cheep, our Benjamin, who spots
land for us, where the plump lemons reside, and also hew nymphs
in marble, if you fancy something haptic

Thank you, please, do go on, but if you don't mind
I'll go load the boat. I shouldn't presume
I know, but believe me, when I found you that time blind

Pissed, I too was utterly distraught. It might not have been so bad
but when I saw you face-down naked in front of the tent, I couldn't
even move, while you go on afterwards to rescue the world? Forget it!

Family? What a pitiful lot. If we survive
to go our separate ways, I get the dogs
and good riddance!

English versions by Karen Solie