(THIS IS A FICTIONAL POEM)

Your dog is humping my leg.
You better stop him or I'll bust your head.
He keeps going and going and he won't stop.
I'm going to hit you in the balls with a karate chop.
It's embarrassing because lots of people are standing around.
Stop him or I'll take the damn mutt to the pound.
I'm getting tired of saying it and I won't say it again.
Get your dog off of my leg or I'll be having to call your next of kin.