People hate me because I'm the world's worst barber.
They have grudges that they harbor.
When I cut a little boy's hair, I accidentally shaved him bald.
His dad came in my shop and you should've heard the names I was called.
I gave the sheriff a haircut and I accidentally snipped off his ear.
He shot me in the crotch and put me in jail for a year.
I decided to save money by making my own shampoo.
But I got my scissors crammed up my nose when it turned a man's hair blue.
Some people came to my shop today and said that I can't be a barber anymore.
People would've been happier if they had done that years before.