(THIS IS A FICTIONAL POEM)

When I offered two bucks for an old lamp, Fred Sanford faked a heart attack.
That made me really mad so I gave the old man a smack.
His son hid in the kitchen because he didn't want a piece of this.
I'll unload on a person's ass if they make me pissed.
They took me to court and the judge gave them all of my possessions.
When you're homeless and wearing rags, it teaches an important lesson.
It's truly awful when you're broke and have to wear rags for clothes.
But it's worse when you're arrested for indecent exposure because one of those rags has a hole.