My cousin shoved a shovel up my ass when he saw me looking at his wife.
But believe it or not, it has improved my life.
Women think I have a second wiener that comes out the other end.
When they see it, they look at it again and again.
The ladies are amazed because it's very long.
My love life has improved because they think I have a second dong.
I used to have to go without sex for months.
But now women want me because I can satisfy two of them at once.