Parody Poems
Princess Peach Turned Out To Be A Snob
by Randy Johnson
I had to travel through eight worlds to save Princess Peach.
But she's about as warm and caring as a blood sucking leech.
After killing seven fake Bowsers, I finally destroyed the real one.
I did it to save Peach but it was something I shouldn't have done.
She turned out to be a snob, she called me dumb and Luigi dumber.
She said that we're worthless in her eyes because we're just plumbers.
I had to fight turtles and Goombas, and I told her that I deserved to be thanked.
She said that I'm dust beneath her feet and I decided that she should be spanked.
I put her over my knee and I spanked that soft ass.
She cried and cried which proves that she has no class.
......
Shall I Compare Thee to a Winter's Night
by Richard Randolph
Shall I compare thee to a winter's night?
Thou art far darker and more cold.
Winter nights oft are long and bereft of light
and slippery roads lead to deaths untold.
Icy winds are another frightful thing,
when gray skies wrap us in a frigid shroud,
but at least we're assured of coming spring
when the warm sun will again shine proud.
But thy cold touch creates an open sore,
such that time and distance can never heal,
......
Ambition - in Kamalas own words
by Dr. Robert Ippaso
What if I can see it, smell it, almost touch it,
That gilded throne where I will proudly sit,
Would people think me mad,
Is my ambition so preposterous and bad.
And why not me, have I not earned this crown,
Someone not worthy of that queenly gown,
Bejeweled and composed for all to see,
My vassals all around, bowing deep to me.
......
The People's Champion - in Trump's own words
by Dr. Robert Ippaso
I get it
I finally get it
It took a while
But now I'm showing my style.
To every home
With somber tone
My daily briefings
Broadcast my teachings;
......
I'm so over this Kurdish thing - in Trump's own words
by Dr. Robert Ippaso
In my infinite wisdom
I tell you this thing,
In this here my kingdom
Will the pendulum swing;
One minute the Kurds
So cute in their garb,
The other the Turks
With their venomous barb.
......
The Sledgehammer - in Trumps own words
by Dr. Robert Ippaso
Folks ask why
I chose Elon as my guy,
Smart and tough
Knows how to fight even when rough,
Let him loose
To put woke projects in the noose,
Cause a stir
For progressives to deter,
Stop the rot
That placed us all in this garotte.
......
And now it starts - in Trump's own words
by Dr. Robert Ippaso
And now it starts,
And yes, I'm back at last,
Four years of trials and tribulations,
Capped off by this raucous jubilation.
I fought and won,
Proved them all wrong,
The denigrators,
The fake media perpetrators.
......
Ambition - in Kamalas own words
by Dr. Robert Ippaso
What if I can see it, smell it, almost touch it,
That gilded throne where I will proudly sit,
Would people think me mad,
Is my ambition so preposterous and bad.
And why not me, have I not earned this crown,
Someone not worthy of that queenly gown,
Bejeweled and composed for all to see,
My vassals all around, bowing deep to me.
......
Let them Wonder - in Kamala's own words
by Dr. Robert Ippaso
I am Indian by birthright,
Simply black when it feels right,
A gender champion through and through,
A Southern Belle from the Bayou.
I cover all the bases from Gay rights to MeToo,
Environmental warriors – I’ll always stand with you.
Black lives truly matter, the Homeless my pet task,
All you need is Me, you don’t even need to ask.
......
I'm Kamala - your next President
by Dr. Robert Ippaso
I'm sitting pretty biding my time
Staying real quiet towing the line,
For President Biden, that lovely old man
Playing the game as only I can.
Why make loud waves, somehow act up,
When everything soon will fall in my lap,
Quiet will do it, with a giggle or two,
Hold my cards close and see this thing through.
......
