I’m always a little surprised when I make people laugh, make them smile. Because it means that they find something about me, even just for a moment, that they like. Something that they might want to keep around.
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Saddling the yellow lines at 95,
Hostage to the late-night drives.
Drowning in the thoughts that ask when I might die?
And if I die tonight, did I satisfy the world that hangs me out to dry?
Staying up most nights, wishing someone would call and ask:
"Are you alright?”, “How you been?”, “What's on your mind?"
I still can't testify that I am fine.
......
The silence in the street was shaping
All there was the beginning of rain
It hits my glasses but hot enough to blind me
I turned to my house slowly
Since there was no one to talk to
I took my time
Slowly I reached the door
And walked in
I was grateful I wasn't caught
For it poured after I closed the door
......
in this molten hollow, crusted with land
overdue says the axis, manic spinning
round and about the magic gravity bond
there was barely a doubt in the eyes of the abyss
it gazes back when the word is said
quick, quick, the moment seeping quick
brushing—in bristles soft—our mystic time
each moment passing by, the fabric
layer stretching out into a platter: shine
presented on the altar of conscience
......
A three legged crow, one day he shone, brighter than he ever had,
looking as if he gleamed with joy, as if he's never been free before,
He was covered in light, but he slowly lost the life he has ever clad,
In the silence of the vantablack, he whimpered the life he had.
The mistress who had bathed in his warmth was sad to watch him depart,
Slowly she would feel the cold of loneliness breathing down her nape,
Her children would meet death's embrace, tearing the mother and child apart,
Leaving the lonely mother to weep with a veil of snow that she would drape,
The universe would watch her silently, as if in this tragedy he had no part.
......
The silence in the street was shaping
All there was the beginning of rain
It hits my glasses but hot enough to blind me
I turned to my house slowly
Since there was no one to talk to
I took my time
Slowly I reached the door
And walked in
I was grateful I wasn't caught
For it poured after I closed the door
......
A three legged crow, one day he shone, brighter than he ever had,
looking as if he gleamed with joy, as if he's never been free before,
He was covered in light, but he slowly lost the life he has ever clad,
In the silence of the vantablack, he whimpered the life he had.
The mistress who had bathed in his warmth was sad to watch him depart,
Slowly she would feel the cold of loneliness breathing down her nape,
Her children would meet death's embrace, tearing the mother and child apart,
Leaving the lonely mother to weep with a veil of snow that she would drape,
The universe would watch her silently, as if in this tragedy he had no part.
......
I’m always a little surprised when I make people laugh, make them smile. Because it means that they find something about me, even just for a moment, that they like. Something that they might want to keep around.
Continue reading
in this molten hollow, crusted with land
overdue says the axis, manic spinning
round and about the magic gravity bond
there was barely a doubt in the eyes of the abyss
it gazes back when the word is said
quick, quick, the moment seeping quick
brushing—in bristles soft—our mystic time
each moment passing by, the fabric
layer stretching out into a platter: shine
presented on the altar of conscience
......
If you were to ask why I wear a weighted vest, I would tell you it's in my best physical interest.
But on a deeper level, body dysmorphia screws with my head, and the lies I tell myself will one day have me dead.
They scream at me to put on the damn vest and don't stop until I can't take another step.
They scream at me to suck it up, so I trek until I inhale but can't seem to catch a breath.
If you were to ask why I'm always with someone, I would tell you that I love my friends and that comfortable silence is truly the best.
But on a deeper level, I can't be alone because of the ways I depreciate myself when there are no witnesses.
If I wake up alone, I rot in bed until it's someone else that might be negatively affected.
If I eat alone, I overindulge, just to come out of the bathroom with my eyes bloodshot and my cheeks puffy and red.
......