Light from two bulbs drapes over my bathroom mirror;
One filament severed and the other quite near.
Steam fogs my reflection from the uselessness of the shower.
A familiar feeling of my lungs: wrangled and floundered.
Sago by my sill, most placate, my mind.
A kind sight to your eye; you'd die for a bite.
White-potted for pleasantries, and loved to a tee.
Mutualistic co-habitants in a cycle of exchanging O2 for C.
......
This poem was inspired by scots poems and is about inspiration that can be found in nature. I saw a visitor's book from Corrour Bothy from the 1930s which was the catalyst of inspiration for this poem.
Some translations for non-scots understanding readers:
Bothy - small remote shelter for hillwalkers
Braw - if something is braw it is good
Bonnie - pretty
Baltic - freezing
Dreich - dull
Drookit - drenches
Burn - small river
......
isolation tastes of frigid air and the roaring ocean's waves,
there is no one who truly knows me, least of all the god to whom I used to pray,
it is a taxing master, its price is steep for those who choose to pay,
but as I stare at its reflection, I find I would have it no other way.
the trick of it is balance, knowing how to fade away,
into the background of existence, away from the sun's harsh rays,
all you have to do is know the role you were meant to play,
a forgettable extra, and darling, the whole world's a stage.
......
As I lay in the darkness
Wide awake
Trapped in my thinking
As I feel unwanted
Selfish thinking I know
Desiring the embrace
Though what I lack
The pain it brings
......
My window looks out on the neighbours.
I see their lives in fragments –
Comings and goings.
I know their routines but not their names.
I see visits from parents,
Siblings and old friends.
I watch him hold her growing stomach,
Rush out to the hospital,
Come home with their child.
I see them take the baby inside,
......
I never learned how to whistle
Seeing others do it with ease
Never having to think twice
Never being questioned
Never confused
I could feel my skin itch
Something that should be easy, natural even
Seemed impossible for me
I wish I did
I wish someone would have taught me how
......
Light from two bulbs drapes over my bathroom mirror;
One filament severed and the other quite near.
Steam fogs my reflection from the uselessness of the shower.
A familiar feeling of my lungs: wrangled and floundered.
Sago by my sill, most placate, my mind.
A kind sight to your eye; you'd die for a bite.
White-potted for pleasantries, and loved to a tee.
Mutualistic co-habitants in a cycle of exchanging O2 for C.
......
All the words
that never left my mouth
creep through my veins
filling the hollows of my mind
and my lungs with stone
encasing the very essence of me
in lead
weighing me down
as the murky depths
......
It was not the first day,
I do not know if it would be the last.
Somewhere I hope it to be,
but I keep telling myself I do not.
The spring leaves are grey,
the blossoming flowers look wilted.
the water of the river have gone still,
there is no mound in the soils.
In this vast open space,
surrounded by the great north mounts,
......
I hear the silence in the way they blink,
the ignorance raining on me,
its ridiculous- I am ridiculous.
it is the answer granted to me.
Every time I glance upon myself on the window,
even the clown of the circus laughs,
bowing down to me- in pity or respect or tease,
I shall take it, I’m desperate, so what?
Should I stop or let it flow,
I fear even the night breeze hides from me.
......