It's high speed, high tech, and turmoil
But I'll still reach age ninety or so
If I don't get blasted by a Captain Kirk
Or get nabbed by a U.F.O.

I was never dented by a one-speed bike
Nor crashed by a runaway horse,
But when driving or crossing our roads today
I'm on a perilous, adventurous course.

The Babe, the Gipper, Laurel, Hardy
Just to mention some oldies by name,
Had talent and pride, not the aura of gold,
To gain seats in the hall of fame.

It's topless, bottomless,and singles bars
And even outrageous TV in the morning,
Riots, murders, inflation and strikes,
And incurable ills with their warning.

I can't agree with this lifestyle
So don't consider me a quack
When I say where's my ice box and radio
And please ... please take me back.