in a bright whitelife I am named harmony,
leap amphibious from genet to xena
effortless as xtc, party with glamour
girls in tinsel shreds, boys

with high draped cheekbones. no dawn
jackhammer disturbs my hangover, sunrise asanas
tone my ass, melon smoothies soothe
my throat whose linesfuel every lurker's

drool. even my damage
is gorgeous & gothic; like a raven
I've fled it snot-free. in this life
past midnight I know I've failed

everything worthwhile—love, art—
as well as what's useless—caches of money,
brood of eggs, songs
I might have learned once

but now can't memorize, hum, or compose.
last night the girl who tried to kill herself came by
to pay back the rupees she owed. coated with shame
she smiled like a toad. I should have said,

I love you, I am you. instead
I winced like an owlet,
ate my salad of raw beef,
wondered what to tweet.