so much for being an atheist,
a secular man: a wordly man of contempts...
so much so when the second divorce
came: first the segregation
of the church from the state...
and now... the nation from the state...

what's left?
trans-gender pansexual grammar?!

not to mention... in the wordly secular
"state"... to have to protect
the newspaper like a church dogma...
and the journalists like they were
priests: indeed...
but we're all literate, aren't we?
broken english or just slang...
but we can still read, can't we?

i too hoped... but journalists seem to be
the new gatekeepers to:
absolutely nothing...
when the only literate man in the village
was a priest...
perhaps...

relegated the once foundational
bastion of free-thinking: again, the church...
but what is the church to a state
outside of the Vatican?
not much...
but this 2nd church of Mammon -
of journalistic "integrity"...
i sometimes think the novel is also worth
being undermined...
the poem: isn't it always undermined?

and to be frank:
i tired of both listening to both nazi
and jewish arguments...
it's like their war of ideas has never
ended... nor did, it would seem...
the hebrew consciously-uncoupling
from german via yiddish...
becoming self-partenered:
to me the the hebrews have finally
come to own a land and nation...
but given their semitic spirit...
there's a fattened layer of their society
that still wants to remain:
free-roaming...

what i wouldn't give to settle down
where i didn't speak this tongue,
or think it, or have to listen to it...
not because i don't want to...
but only because when i hear words:
i subsequently hear pennies
and clanking... and nothing much
urns of...
metal without a value of gold...
being ascribed a value of gold...
and... having the tenacity to be worth
more than gold...

ETH-II-DEI-GRATIA-REGINA...
you print that on a kilogram of
copper... you find yourself owning
a fluctuation of also owning a kilogram of gold...
depending on the whims of speculators...

this grand mythology of money?
i can never "fathom" it...
in that i can in: when was money
ever something worth thinking about,
when did it have to gravitate toward
some mythical purpose?
when did money become the:
philosopher's stone?

money isn't salt... salt is dearer...
money isn't sugar... sugar is dearer...
money is something of "transcendental" meaning:
Caravaggio's: calling of st. mattew...
i have a soft-spot for names...
i too once fixated my gaze on coins
for about half an hour:
i so dearly wanted to see pebbles
and peanuts...

what we give value to is so subjective...
it can't escape subjectivity:
i feel a horrid sensation when
i touch gold... gold to me like
vampires' garlic...
i'm not immune to it,
i wish i was indifferent to it...
but it's still based on a carat scale...
a diamond is not much more
than what broken glass looks like...

journalism as the new priesthood, eh?
the sacred-cows of our very most
sensible materialistic, atheistic,
nation-free states... no?

once upon a time i'd take a bottle of whiskey
and spend hours better "solved"
by sleeping prior to 12am over
hot bagel material...
zombie roger ailes...

when will this nazi hebrew thing die off?
yes: the nazis were the most perfect
enemies... for god's sake...
their uniforms were designed by
hugo boss!
there's fighting such an enemy...
or there's dealing with the golden horde...
smeared in horse-piss and dog shit...

can't an enemy be celebrated
for having some sort of... finesse?
i'd like to kill a nazi because i'd love to don
his army tailoring worth of uniform...
i wouldn't even think about
scalping a nazi... i'd just think about
making precision incissions into his body
into order to take off his corpse
a fucking Hugo Boss!
why scalp: when you can don a hugo boss?!

you can tire yourself thinking of the nazis
as this ultimate: archetype evil...
it's tiresome...
it's even more tiresome with the hebrews
in h'america...
the ones living in Israel are...
like everyone else...
but the ones with nomad-lice are still
so, fucking, fidgety!

move here! move there!
as i have celebrated the tetragrammaton
for not real reason...

and on a stone i would have engraved:
MTW-DEI-GRATIA-QUIS...

or money: a quid pro quo pandoras' box:
with an ante "et plus" suffix attached...

this is such mediocre "musing"...
which comes at a time when:
you invite the world for an evening...
and after 15 minutes you want to tell
it to fuck off...
will anyone not still tire of keeping
the narrative...
once the last holocaust survivor
is burried in israel...
or the last guard of auschwitz is
found?
will it end, there,
i guess not... since the nazis will have
been exhausted as the perfect
villains and the next star wars
chapter will not have the same: relation /
crux impetus to: resonate...

so much for western chauvinism...
so much for Robison Crusoe dread-lock hippies...
so much for anything...

so much for a people who have
finally regained their homeland...
but still have the ants-in-their-pants
still needing to freely roam...
so much for the citizen of the world
and the unlucky bugger who
has to strap himself to israel
and pick the fucking dates for export...

it's just some tiresome to have only these
two outlets of "taking sides"...
i'm starting to think that not having
your own country is a demise...
to have to live in a country where
herbew is spoken freely...
when the secular state has to find its new
enemy in the haredi jews
proclaiming themselves being
exempt from military service...

i'd believe the well versed lessons...
better 2 years in the army than
3 years at university...
why did the Labout gov. open the floodgates
for further education for the lot
of us back in the early 2000s?
the army wasn't exactly scouting... either...
the massive push for "further" / "education"...

there was no: forrest gump moment
to incite a man to join...
then again: modern warfare...
that argument: there's too many people
in the world...
that argument doesn't seem to lend itself
to physical realities...
of actual space...
people congregate in cities...
or not... the problem comes in terms of:
what the hell are these people
going to do, if they're not going to
be a plumber... and being a thief is perceptionally
problematic: but a thief can employ a
police officer and a prison guard...
a murderer can also employ a psychiatrist...

it's not a problem of "how many more people"
and more: what will these people do?
space is not even questioned...
it's what... are these people:
going, to, do? not all of them want
to be criminals... most of them want...
and how many more will it take
in the chinese factories to spew out
the 11th million worth of a toothpick...
a 2nd time in the first quarter of the year...
before... the supposed imbeding
condom / birth-control pill of
technological advancement of robots
comes into play?

i can almost hear of the times when trades
possessed a sense of unique nobility...
an individualising sense of purpose...
none of this mediocre bureucratic ambience...
Satan doesn't even have to come into play
to tell me this world is fake...
nor television, nor make-up...
nor the stage... nor Plato's cave analogy...
bureucracy is enough to tell me:
this world is really fake...
it isn't supposed to be real...
if it were real:
there would be a necessary number of people
doing their necessary jobs...
and since thinking can't be entertaining enough:
per se... we need people as doors as
chains as locks as...
membranes of obstruction:
only for the glory of god's sperm-donor bank
load of: the prize of having the number
of individuals: since even with the bigger
volume of some other species...
the differences in them are so minor
and obstructive that...
you need some hijack of: keeping up with
competence...

there are too many people in this world...
it's not a spatial argument...
it's an existential argument...
in the end some sort of birth control will come
about... beside the condom: call it:
the condom - elevated...
because? what work?

i can imagine a modern dystopia where:
there are just too many prostitutes...
and there aren't enough people in need of a fuck...
its like the leftover monestaries opened
their gates... the monks walked into society
and finding that: not enough people were
allowed feed from the pig's golden trough...
well...

when really un-important jobs have to have their
over-simplified but in-tune exagerrations
met with: synopsis criterium that would
make a fucking heart-surgeon blush with
bewilderment...
so i basically am, a walking abortion...
aren't i?

becoming a thief is almost becoming surreal in that:
well at least i would give employment
to a police officer and a prison guard...
perhaps a social worker...
certainly a probation worker...
who am i missing?

because it's not exactly going to be easy
to find an honest profession...
given that the concept of money was never
an honest point of ref. to begin with...
copper became more valuable than gold...
as long as some little fucker
scribbled something on copper and said:
medium! turn this kilogram of gold
into two! along with a sizeable collection
of human ivory for the churn!

we were children once...
we collected marble balls... we dug holes
in the ground and we wagered...
threw some marbles into the hole for the bet...
then took 8 steps back and played
throwing the remaining bet into the accumulation bet...
whoever managed to throw more marbles in...
won all the marbles...

the mystification of money...
it's worse than the mythology of money...
at least the ancient world had mythologies...
these days... with all our science and areligous
sensibility: everything needs to be mystified!
money is mystified!
of course it is... why would we need
an economist to tell us 2 + 2% of 2 = 2.02 -
add the word: penny... and what the hell do you have?
sure... £2 + 2% = £2.02...
good luck asking for arithmetic from
a mathematician...
who deals with algebra metaphysics...

i can begin to envision a city-state environment...
i can almost begin to see how
world war II started... from the envy of
Danzig... a city-state... something borrowed from
ancient Greece: or the story of Venice...
i can see how jealousy came into conflict
with the nation-states of the times...
so powerful yet so exhausted...
having to shift such a mass of people:
best intention: send them to the slaughter...
i am actually convinced that Danzig was
the sole reason beside all the historical reasons
given... people might have just moved past
Versailles...
but Danzig was bothersome...
a city-state... it allowed for Poles and Germans,
Jews Russians and others to mingle...
are there any modern city-states
nations can be jealous of?
is hong kong a city-state two competing factions
might be found to be fighting over?
unless... the position of Danzig ever changed...
and the age old struggle for a window into
the world by the Poles...
to have access to the sea...
for trade... to not be the next Hungary...
or the Czech Rep...
little good that did "them":
this... sacred fight for an access to the sea...
the people became the sea...
and scaterred... silently... across the world:
me: fraction of the brain-drain...

if only the nation-state was to devolve...
without the church... or the new church of journalism...
or whatever is to be minded...
can a modern London be deemed
as a city-state?
can a modern Paris be deemed as a city-state?
i shouldn't hope so...
it's certainly a free-standing in-and-of-itself
spectacle... but does it have a city-state
gravitas of being a socially-exclusive experiment?
London, everyone knows...
isn't for Londoners...
we will never speak of the minority...
a "supposed" minority... since they're not
exactly exclusively English either...
not on this meat-grinder treadmill of
pork chops becoming pork mince.