Alphonso, Alphonso, Alphonso and Arabella
They happened to meet
A man in the street,
Who carried a gingham umbrella.

Alphonso possessed neither manners nor grace,
He made at this person a hideous face;
But how different the conduct of sweet Arabella,
Who praised with politeness the gingham umbrella.

The man was a nobleman, deeply disguised;
The compliment courteous he pointedly prized;
'Sweet creature,' he said, 'come away from this feller,
And take both my heart and my gingham umbrella!'

The very next morning they met in the church,
And foolish Alphonso was left in the lurch;
And they said, 'In the future you'll know how to tell a
Great lord from a loon, by his gingham umbrella!'