What is your idea of happiness? What is your idea of fun? I felt kinda called out today.
I told a girl I was "sooooo bored" and she said "why"? She had already known I was at a friend's house and I wasn't actually bored but, yet I said it? Was I just looking for attention or was I thinking its my real truth! I was not living in the moment with the companies I was with. People assume happiness is a forever thing.
If you actually determined you're happiness on the level of fun you had at the high stimulating peak moments in your life. You'd then generally live unhappy out of shear percentage of time available.
I lived the largest majority of my life to an extreme in hopes of these glorious peak moments in order to simply have the tale to tell. Then I've learned with age and practice any moment in life can be interesting to tell if the story is told right.
So if it's not about the "glory" persay then what is it about? Maybe happiness has absolutely nothing to do with fun. Fun is simply a momentary overload of enjoyment, while happiness is a more of a long term pleasant contentment for their own life?
How do I achieve a sustainable feeling of happiness? Or even comfortable. Fulfillment comes to mind, but there are all types of people who are fulfilled in some way or another. What does that mean for me? A goal, a passion, a meaningful reason to stay alive?
That might be a little bit too on the nose, but I do believe that throws the demon of the issue out in the sunlight. The root of the fear, failure in life.
What is failure? Hardship in life is my thought, yet to others not conforming to the majority belief is. Are you a failure if you don't fit in within the tribe, or are you a failure if you don't find a real passion for life?
Conformity corrupts the majority. They seem the happiest to me, yet the most regarded of us were trail blazers. Idols to the masses had a belief good or bad and passionately work towards the reality of that thing.
Unhappiness in knowledge and wealth only proves equality in the feeling we have towards life. While the most devoted members of whatever tribe or cult around seem to be the most highly motivated and full of purpose people alive.
Happy because of devoted beliefs, or just comfort from the acceptance within the community they had admired or was nurtured in?
Perception of your own nurture vs nature is the easiest cop out answer for the root of our happiness. Completely true but unhelpful realization for me to ponder in depth.
That interpretation puts the blame entirely on me, which I for one think is fair and just. No proud, noble, or seemingly happy man goes around passing blame on others.