I went to an auction
To bid for a chair;
I bought a stuffed pheasant
Because it was there.

I went to an auction
To buy a divan;
I bought a piano
That wouldn't pian.

I went to an auction
For curtains and things;
I bought an old fiddle
Without any strings.

I went to an auction
To buy me a bed;
I bought an old bundle
Of music instead -

All twiddly old 'pieces'
And ancient quadrilles;
Once played by young ladies
In flounces and frills.

While gall-ants Victorian
Turned over the leaves,
Bewhiskered as tom cats
That court on the eaves.

I went to an auction
Equipped with a list:
Of bargains desirable
Not to be missed.

Of the things that I went for
I didn't get one;
But what did it matter? -
I'd plenty of fun!