Bernadette: O sweet delightful house
why do so many things get lost in you?
House: Maybe you just dream you lose them.
B: How do you know what dreams are?
H: I pride myself on knowing everything you know.
B: Oh, so you know we're getting you new windows?
H: I have trouble with no & know. With knew & new too.
Why do people do that?
B: I don't know; I don't mean I don't no.
H: See, you make it hard for a house. Anyway I don't
usually speak.
B: Do you write poetry?
H: I dabble. I don't know if it's poetry or prose though.
B: It's prose — it's shaped like you.
H: What about my roof?
B: That would be a concrete poem.
H: Even the time the tree fell through it?
B: That would be a different genre, perhaps
conceptual art.
H: I'd like to climb mountains. You can leave me
whenever you want but I'm stuck with you.
B: What was it like when people prayed in you?
H: It was kind of creepy. I liked the Jewish people
better — more love of life. People can do anything they
want to me, I'd like to be more proactive. I'm just
stuck here. Even a cult could move in.
B: I've never been a therapist for a house. How was
your childhood? Were you born?
H: I was made of mostly local stuff. Don't set me
me on fire. I tremble every time you light that wood stove.
B: There was no heat when we moved into you; there
were also 24 doors.
H: Don't blame me, I didn't do it.
B: You didn't do anything but be here like an immobile
tree, but you provided shelter. Can houses tremble?
Do you have a sex life?
H: None of your business. The sex life of houses isn't
known to humans, nor will it ever be.
B: You seem to have mastered grammar but not homonyms.
H: I liked it when I was unoccupied, full of birds' nests
on the porch & ghosts inside, I felt fulfilled.
B: How did you like the Hebrew books?
H: They reminded me of my bat mitzvah.
B: You never told me you were Jewish.
H: I thought you'd never ask.