Aspen M

September 23, 2000 ~ Indiana, US
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My Detangling

Hands, running across soul

Stern, firm

Authority, knowledge

I'm too weak, running, drifting

Water

You prop me, contain me, hold me, restrict me

Love me

To you, perhaps, maybe

Hairbrush through my essence

Detangling

˚˚˚

Your eyes, warm on my neck

Rough hands, pulling me along

You want me to toss it,

Back, forth, aimlessly

Yet always seeking you

You don't see it

I love you so much

And you don't feel it

Cloth cages, every holiday

Replaying again and again

A cavern of broken, empty, echo

You scowl at the way i talk

Teach lessons

Splinter, fracture, find, discover, describe

detangle

Within me, you search for him

For you.

Prized, cherished, possession,

son...

explosion inside me

I can't do this

˚˚˚

Elegance ordains the air

Sacred lyrics swirl, abound

Life line to heaven,

Chaos confound

I climb the steps,

Stairway to you

They watch, sing

My song joins in, chorus alive

Comfortably lost

Myself you strive to find

In myself, you peer

Peek, pry, gaze

Pull her out

You've seen her now, me

The way i talk, how i hold my hips

I see it too

The panic in your eyes

Canvas, paint, plastered

Bright shadow, calm cacophony

˚˚˚

I found the piece of you

That you left upon the table

Inscription, memory, prophecy

Drawing

You made a drawing

Moment of boredom?

Seeking release? relief?

Remembering?

I remember

It was beautiful

Even now

Even then

You are beautiful

˚˚˚

Pull it out

Unravel

Burn it

Detangle

Same words, new source

Unbury it

Reveal him

Drive the mantra through his heart

Lose him inside the carousel, cornfield, crayon-box

Of your mind.

Biting nails, squeezing toes

Tense

Murky

Clarity

No

I refused it before, refused to give her away, to sacrifice girl for boy

Now i refuse to kill boy

For in doing so,

I destroy myself

Detangle,

i cannot

˚˚˚

My hair grows,

curling, stretching

Remembering old forms, and adopting new

This, my home, hardly

Garden, planted with seeds of your selection.

i choose what grows,

Chose,

Long ago

Will choose,

Long ahead

You remain with me, even now, even then.

Throughout our Detangling.
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