Amit Majmudar

1979 / New York, United States

Apocalypse Shopping List

Lead-lined gonad-guards.
Lysol (radiation sickness causes killer runs).
Breadboxes, to bury stillbirths.
Flare guns, glue guns, gun guns.
Marijuana brownies for the burn units.
Ersatz shrouds (viz., bedsheets, towels, sails).
Triple-earwig-pincer Biohazard labels.
Fun Size Snickers Not Labeled for Individual Sale
But good to barter in a pinch.
Amputation pails.
Seeing-eye dogs bunker-kenneled in Kennebunkport, Maine,
To jog the flash-blind through uranium rain.
Astronaut ice cream for the bedbound.
Catheters (various calibers).
Lice combs to harvest protein.
Steri-strips.
Spike strips.
Benadryl, good for baby's colic or mommy's hives.
Teriyaki turkey jerky.
Paperback copies of Slaughterhouse-Five.
Bullhorns for the water rioters.
Firehoses for the riot police.
Wooden stakes, because you never know.
Four-ounce jars of Fleischmann's yeast.
Gallon jugs of Zen.
Rabbit traps, for the mice of the future.
Bear traps, for the men.
168 Total read